Today is a difficult day. Sometimes, no matter what you do as a mother, you can not make everything better. "Bipolar sucks!" Isaac screams as he's ripping at his clothes while his sensories are extra high today. His moods have fluctuated since yesterday. He is unable to find calm within his body. Fighting to control something inside his body that sometimes feels larger than he is. Today is a day of walking in circles and feeling extremely uneasy in his skin. I can only provide coping skills and give him space while he works through it. I am proud of how hard he works to push himself through this and come out the other side, time after time, as his illness threatens to take over my sweet, strong, brave little boy. I wish I could tell him how proud I am of him in a way he can understand. My heart is heavy today, and I am fighting back tears.
All brain disorders should be discussed as a whole. This is not a chosen path; these children require comfort, understanding, and support. They are just as deserving as any other child with any other illness. Today I am JUST, and my energy is drained. I am exhausted, and we are on day two. I have no idea how he feels physically or emotionally, but I know how it affects me.